Barry contacted me last week asking if he could come and see Ma. Nothing unusual in that and one that is guaranteed to please her. Despite the grip of dementia she does still remember how to flirt :) I was pleased that he was coming because I had things I wanted to discuss.
He arrived with some fudge because it was my birthday bless him, such a lovely thing to do. Then told me that Spurr House will no longer accept Ma because of her challenging behavior so the respite week I'd booked over Christmas is no longer and I have to try and find another place for her in a home which offers specialist EMI care. There's one home about 10 mins away which does offer the facilities needed so I'm off to have a look at it with Joani on Weds, she's not only a lovely friend but also works in the dementia field and is invaluable when doing this sort of thing.
Barry also stated that he wants Ma to have a Nursing Care assessment which would, should it be successful mean that her care needs would be paid for via the NHS. And the potential for a huge financial burden to be lifted.
I have been advised by family members and friends over and again to request an assessment for continuing healthcare funding via the NHS. Should the assessment be in our favour this would mean that Ma could go into a home with a specialist dementia care facility. I talked to Barry about it on Friday and he is happy to run this alongside the Nursing assessment. I'm not sure that Ma will qualify for it yet despite her challenging behaviour but I am willing to try.
I vowed that I would not put her into care but her behaviour is becoming so difficult to deal with that I am happy to admit that I was naively optimistic. She is violent, not all the time and I hope I haven't given that impression, however her repetitive behaviour really is extremely challenging to anyone's sanity.
Then again we have just done two giggling choruses of 'Goodnight Sweetheart' whilst waltzing to bed, so it's not all bad.
Not at all.