My mother was diagnosed with vascular dementia in 2010. This is a blog about coming to terms with her absent mind.

Tuesday 4 October 2011

Another Tuesday

We are definitely going through a morning phase of tears and tantrums at the moment. Today was no exception and took the best part of four hours to get her up, showered, dressed and fed and she needs help with every part of that ritual. Making sure she takes her tablets properly or combing her hair is hardly arduous but the washing/shampooing/tooth brushing etc. takes some doing without her using after sun to wash or spraying deodorant in her hair. Getting dressed is still an obstacle course but by laying out clothes for her at least guarantees a reasonably sensible outcome. Then she needs reminding on how to use a knife and fork properly. But on other days she will breeze through some of it without any difficulty so then if I get involved I get into trouble!

The tears continued until 2pm today. Enervating for both of us.

The thing that makes you so weary is the constant repetition - both from her and to her. Without instruction she is lost but neither can she follow even the simplest of verbal direction. An example: there are two sofas in the living room placed at right angles to each other. Her zimmer frame was to the side of the junction of the two sofas where one walks between them to go in and out. As she set off for the bathroom I told her to take her frame. She stopped. The frame was at her right hip with one sofa facing her.

This? *points at cushion in front of her on the sofa*

No. Your frame. It's next to you.

This? *points at cushion again*

No next to you, there. *I point at frame*

*takes a step forward. Tries to use the sofa as a walking aid*


She really doesn't understand the television anymore either. Several times over the last few days she has tried to insert things into it or believes that someone is talking to her - Alan Titchmash and Vicki Michelle were discussing my dad this afternoon apparently.

We've been to the GP this afternoon where he gave her a flu jab and has confirmed that we have an appointment with the dementia team on the 28th.

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I've done a lamb thing for this evening. Let's call it Fragrant lamb with cashew nuts. Basically, cubed lamb, onions, garlic, ginger, a bit of chilli, lamb stock, 3 cloves, cinnamon and bay leaves in the bottom oven for two hours. To this I will add a carton of coconut cream, and some lightly fried diced courgettes and cashews. And possibly some chopped coriander and/or parsley. It smells lovely.

Edited to add: Make this. It was beyond delicious.

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